Abandonment
- Mar 23, 2018
- 3 min read
When a parent leaves you, all that’s left is a hole in your heart. You try to fill it with other things - both good and bad. Some might work for a little while, but ultimately, there is only One Person who can fill that hole.
God.
The key is, you have to let Him help you. More than that, you have to want Him. He goes where He is invited, so until you’re ready to surrender to His will and give up these things that will only ever temporarily satisfy you, nothing you do will help.
Forgiveness is a powerful thing and one of the hardest steps you will ever have to take. Forgive them, not for them! God will bring justice to them one day, whether you ever get to see it or not. Forgive them so you can stop holding onto the past. You can’t move forward if you’re always looking back. Forgiving doesn’t mean you forget or excuse what they have done. No. It’s simply you saying that you’re not going to let them or Satan control your life anymore. It’s making a stand and putting your feet down. It’s you wanting to be more than where and what you are right now. It’s freedom and it will start the healing process.
Abandonment leaves disaster in its way. You feel like if they left you, so will everyone else. Or, if you weren’t good enough for them why would you be good enough for anyone else?
These are lies!
Satan uses abandonment, taking advantage of other people’s mistakes in leaving, and uses it to turn these lies into core beliefs. But they are not true! Your parent made the choice to leave. Nothing you did caused it and nothing you did would have changed it. The world is filled with bad people, yes, but it’s also filled with good people. Not everyone in your life is your parent. Not everyone will leave you like they did.
“But you don’t understand what I’ve been through,” you say or think.
My dad walked out on my Mom, sister, and I. I felt like I wasn’t good enough for him to stay and therefore, felt like I wasn’t good enough for anyone else. My family supported us and my mom sacrificed so much to provide for my sister and I and to give us a good life. With my dad leaving, it lead to years of me people pleasing my friends at school, desperate to keep them in my life. I became who I thought they wanted, to keep from ever being abandoned again.
I hated my dad. Hated him.
But there came a point in my life where I was tired of being stagnant, tired of still letting my dad control me years after it was all said and done. So I prayed, and prayed, and prayed. God worked in my heart and eventually, I forgave dad. It’s an ongoing process, where I have to choose every day not to be angry, not to hold onto the past, where I choose to love instead of hate, choose to forgive and let go and move on. It isn’t easy.
With God all things are possible!
God is ready and waiting for you. He wants to help you and He enjoys doing so. He will never leave you or forsake you. He is the One true person you can always rely on. He loves you! You’re His precious child. You are beautiful in His eyes, beautiful and loved! Wholly, completely, and unconditionally!
Let God be the parent you never had. He will fill that hole. He is the only One who can. Let your Heavenly Father love you completely with a love that you have never felt before.
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